The Last Song is a movie that is supposed to break your achy breaky heart. Yes, I went there. Do you want to know why? It's because this movie sucks as much as that song. This is another melodramatic mess from the Nicholas Sparks cash cow that have permeated news stands and book stores throughout the world. Now I've never read the books, but if they're as bad as the films then America has gone wrong somewhere along the line.
The film revolves around Ronnie (Miley Cyrus) who is a rebellious teenager. She is sent to spend the summer with her father (Greg Kinnear) in Georgia. You know what's going to happen, she meets a guy that is not in her class, yet they still fall in love. Aaaaaaawww. But, alas, this is a Nicholas Sparks story- someone is going to die.
That's your basic plot in a nutshell. Very simple, seen before, will be seen again as long as Nicholas Sparks can still create sentences. There is one essential problem with The Last Song. One thing turns this movie from a mediocre-average romantic comedy to complete garbage. That problem is Miley Cyrus. You see, she can't act. Not at all. It's not there. Not even close. Whoever told her she could go from her pop bubble gum bullshit to drama like this is an idiot. This is the worst single performance I have seen in years. Years! I would call her acting skills on par with anyone in the original I Spit On Your Grave. That crap may work on the Disney Channel, but in real movies it's called shit. Pure shit.
Like I said, take away the Cyrus performance and you have a mediocre movie to begin with. She sends this to oblivion. There's probably a dozen young actresses out there that should have gotten this role, but they don't sell lunch boxes and movie tickets as well. Let's hope Miley's fifteen minutes ends before she soils a movie screen again.
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