Chappie (2015) ***1/2

Neill Blomkamp films tend to tread on that future that is just beyond our reach. Looking at previous work, such as District 9, it could be a few months or decades into the future. The present is there, but the cusp of the next big thing exists. It may not be as bleak as some, but there still is a horrifying ingredient of the evil that men do. And yes, it is generally man that commits the heinous act.

In Johannesburg,  crime has spiraled out of control. As a reaction to the rise in illegal activities the police enlist the help of robotic officers. I know what you’re thinking: Robocop. But that’s not where this film goes. It’s merely a cornerstone to the overall story, plus these robots are more agile than Robocop. Think about comparing an elephant to a jaguar. These machines are highly successful and leads their creator (Dev Patel) to obsessively work on a new program that defines consciousness. After “requisitioning” a unit that is going to the scrap heap as a test subject, the creator uploads his software and life begins for Chappie (Sharlto Copley), but not before he’s taken by a group of criminals that had their eye on The Creator to turn off the robots so that they can commit crimes without their interference. The proceeding film follows Chappie as he quickly grows while be influenced not only by his environment, but the rules set down by The Creator.

Obviously, you’re feeling some Biblical references with The Creator and Chappie’s struggle with following his orders and adapting to the environment he lives in, particularly the influence of Mommy and Daddy(Yolandi Visser and Ninja). There is a religious arc throughout the film as the character falls and rises again. There is a definite District 9 feel to the piece that harkens back to that fine film. I will warn you that if you’re seeing this title thinking that it’s a children’s film, you will be sorely mistaken. This is far from it, even with the Short Circuitesque plot. Hugh jackman plays a nemesis that does things to our protagonist that goes way beyond the norm, more like torture, Steer kids away.

Blomkamp has delivered another emotional rollercoaster film that encourages the viewer to think about our society right now, from the viewpoint of a possible future. It also delves into the idea of the meaning of life, but with a refreshing take. Chappie doesn’t try to answer the question of what is the meaning of life, but it follows the process of an individual learning what that really is and that’s really the whole essence of this film. Though it has some flaws, it’s a fine film that delivers some introspection when least expected. ***1/2

Zombie Nightmare (1987) 1/2

He's the hero Gotham deserves.

Zombie Nightmare is about a softball player who is hit by a car and killed. He is then brought back to life by a voodoo priestess. He takes out his revenge on those who killed him. There are cops involved and some stuff. 

Zombie Nightmare is a film more terrible than the description I just wrote, a film so poorly executed, written, directed, and acted that it has become the stuff of legend for almost thirty years. When I stumbled on this film I didn't know MST3K had riffed it long ago, which the filmmakers should be thankful for because that means it shall live forever, if not in the way they wanted.

Adam West gets top billing. He's in the film less than 10 minutes. Motorhead get a major credit for music. The Ace of Spades plays over the credits with the rest of the soundtrack being mid '80's death metal of the blech sort. Tia Carrere, pre Wayne's World is in this and actually gets screen time, but is not the vixen on the cover of the film. 

So now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's actually talk about the movie. If you like your movies padded then this is the one for you. We get some driving, some more driving, a mediocre chase in a gym, yadda, yadda, yadda. It's the typical stuff that pads a movie from student film to feature length. 

The acting? Well, when Adam West is your best actor, that about sums it up.

Ugh, this movie is so bad I don't even want to talk about it anymore. The writing sucks, the plot twist is predictable, and the only meaningful experience you can have with this film is making fun of it. 

I think I've written a review as terrible as the film.

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) *****

Apocalyptic films are usually a hit or miss subject. Many are forgettable or cliched to the point of being one big joke, kind of like the film within the film by the Mackenzie brothers in Strange Brew. Some films get it really right, while others get it really, really wrong with disastrous and silly results.

When one thinks of the modern apocalyptic film the template for that genre of cinema was crafted by George Miller. His major debut Mad Max (1979) was less apocalyptic and more a '70's exploitation car chase flick sent to hell and back, making the film an achievement in film making. It pushed the envelope at the end of the decade.

It would be the sequel to that film, Mad Max 2 or The Road Warrior here in the states, that would define Miller's vision of the world beyond the end, the people that lived after the "event". The Road Warrior is one of those rare films that exceeds its predecessor with a story that, while simple, is presented in a way that is unforgettable and burns itself into your psyche.

We'll skip Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. It has its place and its moments, but is really a film that Miller cared very little about as he left the world of Max for thirty years.

Mad Max: Fury Road is a return to the supercharged film that The Road Warrior happened to be. Max (Tom Hardy) once again runs afoul of a mutant clan using slave labor and water to control their little piece of a broken world. Led by Immortan Joe (played by Hugh Keayes-Byrne, who played the Toe Cutter in the original film) a chase ensues after  Furiosa (Charlize Theron in an awesome performance) steals a commodity that is sacred to the enraged leader.

A simple story if there ever was one, but this goes beyond that. Fury Road is open to close action with very little time to catch your breath. Some films are called a roller coaster ride, that age old cliche that they slap on posters. Fury Road is like going into hell  without any looking back. It's funny that a film set in a fictional version of our world can draw so many parallels to life itself.

What really stands out in Fury Road is the role of women. For a film titled Mad Max, the strongest character in the film is Furiosa, a warrior that does not give up, leading her ironic cargo to a promised land that may or may not exist. Distant memories or wishful thinking? There are moments when Max feels like a side character and this is Furiosa's movie. It's an amazing thing to see in film where a woman is neither a pawn nor a gimmick, but an integral piece to the film. She is the center that everything about Fury Road revolves around.

I was more than sketchy when I heard that another Mad Max film was on the way. So many returns in the last decade have floundered over the indulgences of these sequels and reboots. It's about a 50/50 split in that arena. Fury Road is probably the best of the bunch and is probably one of the best films of 2015 so far. It is a credit to credit masterpiece that really cuts at the other blockbusters of this year and the almost stagnant world of super hero movies. Fury Road is, ironically, a breath of fresh air in a cinematic universe that tends to regurgitate last years product. Dare I say that this film is Miller's masterpiece, possibly even surpassing The Road Warrior? I don't know, but I really, REALLY want to watch it again.

Jurassic World (2015) ***1/2

Chris Pratt and friends storm into battle in Jurassic World.

In a year that is bound to be full of nostalgia (Terminator in July, Bond in November, Star Wars in December) this film has become the unexpected juggernaut of Summer 2015 and continues to rake in the dough at extraordinary rates. The fact that the Jurassic Park franchise has been lackluster at best since the great original film makes the success of this film all the more striking. 

It's been over 20 years since that terrible day when John Hammond's creation crashed into itself and dashed all of the hopes and dreams detailed in the first half of the original film. The park is closed, for good, or so we thought. Multiple deaths and general mayhem couldn't keep a great money making idea down and for the last two decades Jurassic World has been open for business, built on the corpse of the original park.

At this point the whole idea of dinosaurs actually being alive has become old and passe', so there is a need to up the ante so to speak. That means that, like the original film, it's time to play with our handy genetics set and create dinosaurs that never existed. Hybrids developed my man, making us more god-like than in the original film. Obviously, this becomes a huge mistake as our new creature is developed too well. Add in a plot that concerns weaponizing dinosaurs and you have your film ladies and gentlemen. 

Jurassic World is a great summer flick. It's what every summer needs and sometimes doesn't get, which is happening a lot lately. It's an action packed spectacle that finally carries on the tradition of the first film (but doesn't surpass that film). There are some problems with the film, mainly in the sub plot with the military that is so predictable it's boring, but otherwise the film stands up well and won't disappoint fans of the original film or newcomers to the franchise. Thankfully, it appears that this film ignores what happened in the second and third films.

Which begs the question of how will they follow up this film. The humongous amount of money this film has made makes a sequel inevitable, but the issue is that there isn't much you can do with the subject matter without rehashing one of the awful sequels or making an unrealistic sequel. But the film is about dinosaurs, so who cares.

Sin City: A Dame To Kill For *

It's been close to 10 years since Robert Rodriguez brought us Frank Miller's vision of urban decay and decadence to the big screen with the original Sin City (apparently I have never reviewed Sin City, but I did review the bastard cousin of these films here). The original film held the story together, even though it diverged into separate tangents, zig zagging like a runaway gunfight. It's not a masterpiece, but it is a great example of comic/film cinema that really represents the heart of Frank Miller's work.

Sin City: A Dame To Kill For (we'll call it Sin City 2 from here on out) is quite frankly a mess, which is strange since this film has been in development from the moment the first film hit theaters. Many of the same characters from the original film return to cause havoc and mayhem in Basin City. There are some new faces and recasts, but the general idea is the same. A collection of stories all tied together into a bigger picture. I won't go into details, but it's the same concepts as the first film. They're just executed very poorly.

I've seen the first film at least half a dozen times, recently watching it about a month before. While watching Sin City 2 I was lost on where this event fell into the chronology of the first film and wondering if there was a plot hole or not. I like movies that make you think, but when I'm sitting there trying to figure out if this is a filmmaker screw up it really dampens the experience of watching the film.

The film cliches itself constantly. Within the first hour three characters are thrown from a moving car. It turns into a running joke and as the film continued on it was almost like I was watching a parody of the first film. What I hoped was going to be a continuation of the story Miller had created turned into a tedious experience that just had me hoping for the end. This turned into one of the worst films of the year and a huge disappointment for me.

I don't know if it was the long length of time it took to get this film made or the need to present it in 3-D (ugh) or poor film making in general, but Sin City 2 is a stinker. If you have never seen the first film or even haven't visited it lately, you will be lost in the convoluted story that literally goes nowhere. If you're a fan of the previous film you will be disappointed.

Carrie (2013) **

It's been 40 years since Stephen King published his first novel. Over the proceeding decades we would see an onslaught of King's work translated to the big screen, some with great results and the others resulting in garbage, but that's the way it is with a body of work that is continuously wanted by an eager public.

This is the third time that the first novel by King has been presented, the first being Brian DePalma's early classic that exhibits all that DePalma was to be, good or bad, and starred and excellent Sissy Spacek as the title character. There was a sequel somewhere, a TV remake (neither of which I can comment on because why should we bother). This newest version comes to us from director Kimberly Peirce (Boys Don't Cry), bringing us an examination of a scared, uninitiated high school girl from an actual woman. Who would have thought...

The story is the same. Carrie White (Chloe Grace Moretz) has lived a sheltered life with her mother (Julianne Moore), a religious zealot trying to make amends with what she considers a hedonistic past. As always, this goes great for a senior in high school who becomes a woman in the middle of gym class. a guilt ridden fellow student decides to have her boyfriend take Carrie to the prom to make amends, but other students aren't as guilty as she. If you have seen any other the previous incarnations, you know the rest.

The film is your basic rehash of the original film and book. There is nothing new here. It's the same animal as 40 years ago. The big finish is epic and satisfying, but the ending leaves something to be desired, almost taking a twist into action overload Michael Bay territory. This is where the original film has the advantage over this new model. The ending here is just to much for a film such as this. It just doesn't gel with the rest of the film.

As always, remakes are remakes and Hollywood still tries to milk an old franchise for all its worth. Carrie is a simple rehash that isn't even twisted around a bit to bring us something new. Unless you're viewing this for free, skip it. You've seen the original. Go find a nice independent film or documentary. Experience something new.

Gone Girl *****

We get caught up in the whole idea of thrill rides when we talk about the soundbites that come from merchandising films, especially in the last decade or so. We're promised a roller coaster, but we get the usual, mundane drive to work that we've seen time and again. In Gone Girl we get the opposite. What starts out as your typical Lifetime movie fodder suddenly slams on the brakes and becomes something original in that it takes our emotions on the thrill ride that we're always promised, but rarely receive.

Nick Dunne (Ben Affleck) leads a mundane life with his wife Amy (Rosamund Pike) in South Eastern Missouri. After a pedestrian encounter with his twin sister (Carrie Coon) discussing the chore that going thru the game that has become their anniversary has become, Nick returns home to find his wife missing and the signs of something being afoot. Cue the impending investigation, the secrets that Nick and his wife hold close to their chest, and the transformation from helpless victim to heinous villain and back again.

Gone Girl is a difficult movie to discuss with someone who hasn't seen the film because you lose the central pivot of the film that everything is centered on. Just as with his previous work, David Fincher has chosen to take us on a ride where we think we know where the hell we're going, but the bus took a right instead of a left and takes us to a shocking new direction that delights us because we just don't know what's going to happen next. That's what makes a movie great- it takes us somewhere we've never been before.

Another aspect of Gone Girl is the way it manipulates the audience and the commentary that this makes with society today, in particular reality television. I can't really call it a commentary. It's more like a metaphysical conversation with the way people turn on a dime emotionally on the screen and the way our emotions as an audience are twisted. You will wonder how gullible these people are, being told how to feel by the talking heads on the television, all the while you're making your decisions on how you feel about the characters based on what you see on the screen. Your feelings for these characters will change more than once as the movie progresses and it's great. It's wonderful to have a film that doesn't have characters that fit right into their cookie cutter positions. It's even better when they can't figure out which little slot they belong in, either.

David Fincher has delivered another masterpiece that can be considered a thrill ride. The audience is emotionally whipped around on his Gone Girl roller coaster, the main difference being that you don't see the curves coming or the big drops that cause our hearts to race and adrenaline to flow. They're just dropped on you. It's like a sunny day after a week of rain. You've almost forgotten what a great film looks like.